Reassurance Needed

Started by avago, February 14, 2014, 17:58:35 PM

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avago

Hi everyone , Me and my wife used to visit fuert every other year , but last year sadly I lost her . After a lot of thought I booked a week at the Jandia Princess for this coming may . This is a hotel we have stayed at before so I will be familiar with the surroundings . I was quite looking forward to it until I read in some posts that older single men are sometimes looked on  as a bit dodgy . I am in my 50s and I am only looking to chill out and read while tanning on the beach , I don't want to be looked at as a some sort of pervert .
    I hope I have got this wrong , when I used to use the beach with my wife I don't remember feeling this about single males on the beach .  :-\

SheilaW

Quote from: avago on February 14, 2014, 17:58:35 PM
I read in some posts that older single men are sometimes looked on  as a bit dodgy . I am in my 50s and I am only looking to chill out and read while tanning on the beach , I don't want to be looked at as a some sort of pervert .
I've been a naturist for many a long year and take each single man on his merits. It's all about vibes. If I get any bad ones then I'm very much on the defensive, whatever his age, although a bit less now that my kids are long grown up. But if you're giving off those nice 'happy in my skin' vibes, I'm sure nobody will treat you as anything other than a 'normal' naturist.

Let's face it: we're all considered perverts by some textiles! If we let it get to us then we're doing ourselves a disfavour so I just look textiles in the eye (normally while they're looking at my middle-aged boobs :) ) and get on with my life. It's their problem; as it is the problem of naturists who consider all single male naturists perverts.

SoCal

#2
As a person who shows up in Fuerteventura as a single man who enjoys a tan and loves reading, I can assure you that regardless of what you do, some people will see you as a "dodgy" character.   Of course for some, you will be seen dodgy because you are older than 30. And for some, you will be viewed as dodgy because you might be from the U.K. You could be seen as dodgy because of your skin color, your accent, your hair, etc. And if you have chest hair that sticks out above your t-shirt : clearly dodgy. (This characteristic of a supervisor was the objection in a sexual harassment complaint. The complaint did not go very far.)

But as a "single" guy who is nearly always nude, has no pubic hair, and wears an ear-ring (totally dodgy  :o), I can think of only one time where I was confronted about it. It was a time I was hiking in the dunes in the nude and some guy told me I was too close to the road. After he yelled at me to move, he proceeded to urinate by the side of the road. (Maybe I should exclude him.  ???) Other than that one incident in weeks of visiting, my experience has been either neutral or positive.

I've never seen parents pull their children from lagoons while I was swimming,  laying on the beach or walking by. Basically they do nothing different.  And even though I would show up nude within a few meters of a beach bar before I threw on my wrap, all I have experienced is positive responses by the owners and servers, including free beer because I was such a good customer.  I stay nude around the apartments that I rent from - clearly "dodgy character" behavior  :o - and yet the vast majority of people have been accepting or saw me as a positive role model. "Heck, if he can do it, why not me!"   But I can tell there are some people, nearly always males who seem to be highly insecure about their own sexuality, who see me as a "pervert" and avoid me.

Relax my friend. It is a big island and life is way, way, way too short.   :(  My experience is that if you are pleasant, most people will be pleasant to you.  Enjoy your time. And tell us about it afterward. :D

Edited to add emoticons which, according to a recent study, are read as facial expressions of the writer.
Biking and beaches - total freedom

Magoo

Hi Avago

Really sorry to hear about your loss, it really set me thinking. My wife & I have had many happy holidays on Esquinzo beach.  Would I go back alone if I was in your position? Most likely yes, but it would not be the same & indeed might even be an upsetting experience.

As for the question of dodgy single men, as has been pointed out, its more about behaviour & vibes than the single act of being a lone male. I really hope you find what you are looking for, as Fuerteventura is a great place to be.

avago

Thanks for all of your positive comments, it really does help . I think you are all right in saying it comes down to your own attitude towards other people .   I love the laid back lifestyle of Fuerteventura and it is one of the only places I have visited that I can truly relax and forget about work and the UK . Hopefully this will be one of many happy visits .

Champlain Girl

Avago, just go and enjoy your holiday and don't worry what other folks think, they are the ones with problems!

You have now got reassurance so get sunning yourself, a good book and a nice long cool drink! 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)

Champlain Girl

dampsquib

Just when I thought it was safe for us single chaps to venture out ....
Don't let this put you off, but I had a bad experience yesterday afternoon. After a weekend of bad weather, the gaps between showers seemed to be increasing, so I ventured along the coast to my regular stone circle. I like it, as it has a table stone in the wall on which I place food for the squirrels, lizards, small birds, and an impressive raven (least, I think he's a raven). Having been there just a couple of minutes, my first squirrel showed up. I also put out fresh water for my friends, which they appreciate, but sadly there is no shortage of fresh water at the moment in Fuerte'.
Anyway, the beach was pretty much deserted, but in the shelter of my circle, I planned to enjoy a couple of hours of occasional bursts of sunshine. Sadly a couple of minutes later, a bloke comes wandering by and suspiciously moved into the next circle to me. Bad Vibes right from the start! He broken the unwritten 'urinal rule' of if there is one in use, but a row free, you don't use the one next to the chap who is already there. My new neighbour kept his top on but removed his shorts. I suspect some inappropriate touching was going on, so I sat down low on the sand so that he was completely out of sight. Then the b*gg*r stands up, presumably so he can still see me. Right! I'm off. If someone else should pass by, I don't want to be associated with this sad desperate git. I packed up and moved a few hundred yards down the coast and found another circle. I couldn't believe it, when another bloke with a dog appears and slowly ambles along towards me. Instead of walking past, he comes to the entrance of my circle and stares at me. I quickly told him to sod off (in very strong terms). I decided to move again, and keep moving. God! Was Sunday International Perverts day?  >:( There nothing noted in my diary. I've never had a problem in this bay before, and I hope I don't ever again. It's these gits who get us single chaps a bad name!
I expect simply moving on was the best response, but I wondered afterwards if I should have started to take their photo. Maybe they would have then cleared off sharpish?

maxieman

I've been on my own just sth of Corrie a few times and I've mixed experiences. Most have been the usual being stared at by gays (which I simply take a compliment as I'm in my early 50's and have seen better days). But Fuerte and it's people are diverse. I met a lovely Italian lady one morning. She was intending to park herself in the pod next to mine - one I avoided as a smelt to high heaven. I caught her eye and gave her the international sign for "yes it stinks" and she promptly moved over to my pod and asked if she could park in with me. I have to say this gave me a bit of buzz afterwards thinking hey, I mustn't look at all dodgy. We had a nice day and a few beers in the evening.

Another day I was in approached by a "lady" gesturing if I had a light. I waved back no but she stode on up to my pod and actually came into it where she pulled out a lighter and lit the ciggie she had between her lips. She was actually wearing a dress which should have been a sign but I wasn't expecting her to offer sex. She was a case of "would ya, could ya". I didn't even bother to venture how much. I politely gestured for her to take a hike which she did without any complaint. A few seconds later a chap who I can only describe as possibly being a protector of the "dunes" came over and asked if I had realised she was off her head and a druggy. Obviously, I had but it just goes to show that single men can be regarded as anything but dodgy.

Enjoy Fuerteventura. It's got it all!


angiebabe

Hi avago.  As long as you are reading and not w.....g you will be fine.  Lets be honest. The women are there to look at men and the men are there to look at women . Enjoy

avago

Thanks for all the replies, this single holidays thing seems to be a bit of a minefield but looks like it could be interesting.

avago

 just got back had a great time, just what I needed . Being a single guy on a beach nude is fine as other people have commented , as long as you are going about your own business  and not bothering any one else, other couples are fine . The couple in the next pod to me after a few chats even invited me over for a bit to eat .
    The only downer was one pervert , who looked like a local (Spanish) , walked up and down the beach looking in the pods while to put it politely was shuffling his cards . He approached my pod and after a quick f*** off I did not see  him again  . It seems because of a few perverts it makes it harder for the single man on the beach .
   That said I am thinking about booking again in September .

Magoo

Hi Avago

So pleased that you had a positive experience & got chatting to people while scrounging some scran as a bonus.  :D We have booked for September as well, so who knows, we might see you. Alas, we don't do pods as we are fair weather naturists. Last time around we bought mats to use in the pods as the price of sunbeds had gone up for the same tatty old c**p. Sadly we didn't last long before discomfort set in & we returned to our favorite spot. We used the mats for extra comfort on the beds

September seems like an age away

SoCal

#12
Quote from: SheilaW on February 14, 2014, 19:07:43 PM
...Let's face it: we're all considered perverts by some textiles! If we let it get to us then we're doing ourselves a disfavour so I just look textiles in the eye (normally while they're looking at my middle-aged boobs :) )...

I assure you, as a nudist, I am not looking at your middle-aged boobs.  :)  However, this is not to say I may be first concentrating on your face. ;)
Biking and beaches - total freedom

SoCal

#13
Quote from: avago on May 18, 2014, 18:35:09 PM
... He approached my pod and after a quick f*** off I did not see  him again  . It seems because of a few perverts it makes it harder for the single man on the beach .

Ohhhh, I thought you said to me, "Fun cough." I couldn't figure out what you were saying. (The UK and US, two nations divided by a single language.) ;) :D

Glad you had fun. As a "single" male with pervert written all over me (just ask the locals), my experience has been the same. Walk around in a clown suit or smoke crack cocaine, they don't care and I don't care. Just don't force it on me.
Biking and beaches - total freedom